Logo
DiS Needs You: Save our site »
  • Logo_home2
  • Records
  • In Depth
  • In Photos
  • Blog
  • Podcast
  • Search
  • Community
  • Records
  • In Depth
  • Blog
  • Community

THIS SITE HAS BEEN ARCHIVED AND CLOSED.

Please join the conversation over on our new forums »

If you really want to read this, try using The Internet Archive.

87790

Artist-generated

"Drunken drifters and a river that feasted on suicides" - Buck 65 on Anais Nin
"Drunken drifters and a river that feasted on suicides" - Buck 65 on Anais Nin
eurydice by Cate Blanche November 13th, 2012

Following on from last week's foray into the Fifty Shades phenomenon, DiS gets all 'literary' again as Buck 65 writes an exclusive piece for us about Anais Nin.


"Many years ago I met a girl. She was an electro-hippie. Her nose was her most distinguishing feature and she put it to good use. When she wasn't dancing, she listened to Swans and Labradford. She terrified me, which is what I liked about her. She became my girl friend. While we were together, she fucked other people and I didn't care.

Her main hobby was masturbation. It was an elaborate ritual for her. It involved silk pillows and things with tassels and exotic lotions and sometimes Moroccan trance music. She'd be howling in the next room while I fried sausages in the kitchen or watched baseball in the living room.

Sometimes in the afternoons she would wear clothes and imitate a regular person. It was a poor imitation. Part of her disguise was a shoulder bag that smelled like India and hung down to her knees. At any given time, there would be three or four Anais Nin books in that bag.

The electro-hippie read Anais Nin in cafes and bus shelters and in the rain. The prose of Anais Nin was also a part of her warm-up routine for her masturbation ceremonies.

After a year of her shenanigans, I learned to hate the electro-hippie. I came to hate her and anything I could associate with her and that included Anais Nin. I had never read Anais Nin when I met her and made it a point to avoid her name for years after. I couldn't disassociate thoughts of Anais Nin and her sexy diaries from the overwhelming memory of the scent of the electro-hippie's vaginal perfumes.

Ten years later, I moved to Paris. As I was learning the ropes there, I read the works of many of the English-speaking expatriates: Orwell, Hemingway, Miller. I didn't know what else to do. Henry Miller pointed the way to Anais Nin. I turned the other way. I ran, but I couldn't hide for long. A year later, Anais Nin jumped into my hands from under a Christmas tree. My benefactor was in the room and I didn't want to be rude. I spread the legs of the book and buried my nose in it, inhaling sharply. It smelled terrible, which was a relief somehow.

Is there a more boring time of year than Christmas? I think not. And so it was on some late December evening I read Anais Nin for the first time. It was out of desperation. It was that or The Nutcracker On Ice. Jaw clenched, I read a story of drunken drifters and a river that feasted on suicides. There was no sex poetry, no hauntings from the electro-hippie. Maybe it was the suicide, or maybe it was my relief, but when I closed the book and returned to Christmas Hell, I became aware of the faint tickle of tears crawling down my face. I was moved.

I never read Anais Nin again. But I had more jingle-hell to endure that fateful December. So I scavenged a pen and pad and wrote a series of verses based on the story I had read. I hoped it would break the curse of the electro-hippie's taint on my memory. It didn't. But a cornerstone for a new album had been laid. The verses became the "Riverbed" songs that threaded through my Talkin' Honky Blues record, which was released in 2003. Or was it 2002? I can't remember.

I've since lost my copy of that Anais Nin book and I'm not even sure I can remember the name of the story I read. Maybe I'll come across it again one day, but if I never do, that's just fine. If I ever bump into the electro-hippie, I'm sure she could tell me what it was."


Following the release of his album 20 Odd Years, Buck 65 plays the following shows in November:

13th, Temple Bar, BIRMINGHAM
15th, The Haunt, BRIGHTON
16th, The Garage, LONDON



LATEST


  • Why Music Journalism Matters in 2024


  • Drowned in Sound is back!


  • Drowned in Sound's 21 Favourite Albums of the Year: 2020


  • Drowned in Sound to return as a weekly newsletter


  • Lykke Li's Sadness Is A Blessing


  • Glastonbury 2019 preview playlist + ten alternative must sees

Share on
   
Love DiS? Become a Patron of the site here »


Left-arrow

In Photos: Iceland Airwaves 2012 @ Re...

Mobback
87789
87791

Drowned in Leeds #13

Mobforward
Right-arrow


LATEST

    news


    Why Music Journalism Matters in 2024

  • 106145
  • news


    Drowned in Sound is back!

  • 106143

    news


    Drowned in Sound's 21 Favourite Albums of the Y...

  • 106141
  • news


    Drowned in Sound to return as a weekly newsletter

  • 106139

    Playlist


    Lykke Li's Sadness Is A Blessing

  • 106138
  • Festival Preview


    Glastonbury 2019 preview playlist + ten alterna...

  • 106137

    Interview


    A Different Kind Of Weird: dEUS on The Ideal Crash

  • 106136
  • Festival Review


    Way Out East: DiS Does Sharpe Festival 2019

  • 106135
MORE


    news


    The Neptune Music Prize 2016 - Vote Now

  • 103918
  • Takeover


    The Winner Takes It All

  • 50972

    Takeover


    10 Things To Not Expect Your Record Producer To...

  • 93724
  • review


    The Mars Volta - Deloused In The Comatorium

  • 4317

    review


    Sonic Youth - Nurse

  • 6044
  • feature


    New Emo Goth Danger? My Chemical Romance confro...

  • 89578

    feature


    DiS meets Justice

  • 27270
  • news


    Our Independent music filled alternative to New...

  • 104374
MORE
Drowned in Sound
  • DROWNED IN SOUND
  • HOME
  • SITE MAP
  • NEWS
  • IN DEPTH
  • IN PHOTOS
  • RECORDS
  • RECOMMENDED RECORDS
  • ALBUMS OF THE YEAR
  • FESTIVAL COVERAGE
  • COMMUNITY
  • MUSIC FORUM
  • SOCIAL BOARD
  • REPORT ERRORS
  • CONTACT US
  • JOIN OUR MAILING LIST
  • FOLLOW DiS
  • GOOGLE+
  • FACEBOOK
  • TWITTER
  • SHUFFLER
  • TUMBLR
  • YOUTUBE
  • RSS FEED
  • RSS EMAIL SUBSCRIBE
  • MISC
  • TERM OF USE
  • PRIVACY
  • ADVERTISING
  • OUR WIKIPEDIA
© 2000-2025 DROWNED IN SOUND