According to my mates, the all encompassing genre of music I listen to is 'Corpse'.

Some comments whilst forcing music into them:

Joanna Newsome - 'Get this witch off'
Eighties Matchbox - 'Thought Elvis had died'
David Thomas Broughton - 'It sounds like the Marie Celeste' ???
Architecture in Helsinki - 'GCSE music'
Yndi Halda - 'Funeral tunes'

Are your friends budding music journalists too?