Dear Wise Counsel of DiS,

This evening I spent a few hours at the pub with a friend. The reason? He is in love. The kind of love that bubbled between Ross and Rachel throughout the entirety of Friends. Bare with me, this might be a long'un.

Here are the facts. Said friend is 21 years old. He has loved this girl for (approximately) four years. There have been fleeting moments of tangible relationship between the two, but nothing wholesome; nothing fulfilling.

This girl is, admittedly, lovely. She has her flaws (IN MY OPINION, NER) the biggest of which is being a big ol' follower of Jesus H.R Christ. She teaches and - the biggest issue of them all - currently has a boyfriend (who is not listed as 'in a relationship' on Facebook).

However, through various playground tactics, we have established that this girl still has feelings for my good friend. There is, undeniably, something there.

Things have reached, as Papa Roach once sung, a last resort. Tonight my friend discussed the idea of proposing as a means to show how much she means to him. Clearly, this is a man with nowhere left to turn. I said he was mad! He's young, still has so much life to live - he hasn't even been to a brothel I said! A few hours later, and he admitted the idea was crazy talk.

But the problem remains thus: these two, in a Disney story, would be together, and yet they are not.

And so I turn to you, elder council of DiS. Advice, tips, warnings and witty comments are all welcomed as I help my friend conquer our metaphorial Mt. Doom of love. She is back for the summer holidays - what does he do?

Yours,

Concerned, Basingstoke