This is it! Final day! I'm going to condense this to games that matter because I've a train to catch (headed back south)

SKY SPORTS, 6PM
BALTIMORE RAVENS (8-7) @ CINCINNATI BENGALS (10-5)
Ugh. After last week I don't even know what to think any more. Just as the Ravens were looking good, they were miserable at home against a depleted Pats team in a game that could have secured them the playoffs. As things stand, the Ravens (like everyone in the AFC playoff hunt) could win and still miss out. They have more to play for, that's for certain, the Bengals secured their spot last week by virtue of everyone else fucking up. They still could earn the #2 seed, but would need the Patriots to slip up to Buffalo (unlikely, as they're still in with a shout of the #1 seed - NE by 7) but perhaps more to their interest, they have some influence going into the wildcard round weekend next week; lose here and they could face these Ravens at home two weeks in a row. I'd like to offer some insightful knowledge into this tie, but the Ravens were so, so poor last week after picking up some fantastic form that I simply refuse to get my hopes up. I'll be watching, but part of me hopes we just lose and be done with it; this ain't another Cinderella story. (CIN by 4-5)

Baltimore clinches a playoff spot with:

1) BAL win + SD loss or tie OR
2) BAL win + MIA loss or tie OR
3) BAL tie + MIA loss + SD loss or tie OR
4) BAL tie + MIA tie + SD loss OR
5) MIA loss + SD loss + PIT loss or tie

REST OF AFC PLAYOFF RACE:
NEW YORK JETS (7-8) @ MIAMI DOLPHINS (8-7) - So it seems Rex is staying next year, giving the Jets the closest thing to stability they've experienced in years. It would be nice if the Jets could end such a strange season at .500, but nuff respect due to these Dolphins, they've come over a helluva lot of turmoil this year. (MIA by 4-5)

Miami clinches a playoff spot with:

1) MIA win + BAL loss or tie OR
2) MIA win + SD win OR
3) MIA tie + BAL loss + SD loss or tie OR
4) MIA tie + BAL tie + SD tie

KANSAS CITY CHIEFS (11-4) @ SAN DIEGO CHARGERS (8-7) (9:25PM KICK OFF) - When the inevitable happens, I would really like San Diego to get into the playoffs. For this to happen, they need both Baltimore and Miami to lose. One is possible, two is a long shot. So they will know their fate before they kick off today. Kansas are the only playoff bound team today with nothing to play for, locked into (#5 seed) so that helps, but San Diego need help, though not as much as help as... (SD by 7)

CLEVELAND BROWNS (4-11) @ PITTSBURGH STEELERS (7-8)
Somehow, the Steelers are still hanging around like a bad smell. They need a ton of results to go their way (BAL, MIA & SD LOSS) but stranger things have happened... (PIT by 4-5)

Elsewhere, Denver can't finish lower than #2 but probably will lock up (cold) home-field advantage at Oakland today (by 7+) and the Colts (vs Jacksonville) can still catch #2 should New England and Cincy fall (IND by 4-5).

SKY SPORTS, 9:25PM
GREEN BAY PACKERS (7-7-1) @ CHICAGO BEARS (8-7)
So it comes down to this. The usually more consistent NFC North comes down to two struggling teams after Detroit's annual hilarious fall (stay tuned for Dallas to do the same). The good news for Green Bay is, Aaron Rodgers is back. Matt Flynn did just enough to keep them in contention (a decent 2nd half vs. Dallas) while the Bears, similar to my Ravens, were pathetic in an important game vs. Philly last week. It sure will be a lot of fun to see the oldest rivalry in the NFL go for broke despite their already depleted squads, so expect buckets of points (maybe around 100 in total). Rodgers gives me just enough to believe they're going to sneak their way into the play-offs yet again. (GB by 4-5)

REST OF NFC PLAYOFF RACE:
Amazingly, every division is still up for grabs today after Seattle somehow lost at home (for the first time in three years!!!) to the excellent and soon to be dearly departed Cardinals:

ST LOUIS RAMS (7-8) @ SEATTLE SEAHWAKS (12-3)
Perennial trolls St. Louis must fancy an upset after seeing their division rivals do it last week. I can't see it though, Seattle still have a lot riding on this game (they could fall to #5 with a loss today!) and will be playing angry after a humbling defeat to Arizona last week. (SEA by 4-5)

CAROLINA PANTHERS (11-4) @ ATLANTA FALCONS (4-11)
Carolina to wrap up the division against the team with no pro-bowlers this year. Still in with a shout of #1 if Seattle lose, but could go as low as 5 with a loss. (CAR by 7)

SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS (11-4) @ ARIZONA CARDINALS (10-5)
San Fran must be mighty relieved they wrapped up their playoff spot in the last game at Candlestick last week (and they nearly fucked it) otherwise this game would be massive. Poor Arizona, they've been excellent this year and yet chances are they'll be sitting at home next week at the expense of anyone from the NFC North or East. If they do get in, it would be at the expense of New Orleans who have been shaky at best these last few weeks, so there is some hope, but unlikely. SF can still take the division and the #1 seed if both Seattle and Carolina slip, #2 if just the former. New Orleans must lose (or tie) for Arizona to get in. (ARZ by 4-5)

TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS (4-11) @ NEW ORLEANS SAINTS (10-5)
I like the Saints as much as the next guy, but I really would rather see Arizona in the playoffs. I just think they'd have more to give and can prove they can win in the toughest away situations where New Orleans have failed. At home to the struggling Tampa though? Can't see it. Ironically, the Saints can still take the division and the number 2 seed if Carolina slip. (NO by 7)

And finally...
CHANNEL 4, 1:30AM
PHILADELPHIA EAGLES (9-6) @ DALLAS COWBOYS (8-7)
Any slight hope this would be a competitive match went when Tony Romo was declared as questionable. It probably wouldn't have mattered anyway (the Eagles are far more superior/Romo would choke anyway) but it certainly would have made the final game of the season a touch more exciting a prospect. As it stands, this should be fairly routine for a fun Eagles side who could do some damage behind Foles and Chip Kelly's first proper years, and good riddance; if the Cowboys got in ahead of the Cardinals, I think I'd stop watching all together. (PHI by 7)

And that's yer lot (can't be bothered with the 3 dead rubbers, though that's an impressively low number). I'll see y'all tonight by which point I'll have FOOTBALL FEVER.

Sincerely,
Your DiS Keeper League Champion